Friday, May 1, 2009


Ugh. Feeling pretty low right now. Can't believe that I'm only halfway through WUB (taking Mel's acronym for Wait Until Beta). I know I said that I was done analyzing signs and all that... but I guess I lied. It's just that I don't feel anything. During WUB with the girls I was out of breath, slightly nauseous, and my boobs hurt like hell. Right now -- nothing. Zip. Zero. Nada. (Except I'm constantly eating...I think that's nerves though!)

I know each pregnancy is different. I know that, but it's still got me feeling down.

I just so want this to work. I feel like Kristen from the Biggest Loser. Just as you finally admit how much you really really want it and damn it you deserve it, you're voted off.

I also just got back from a meeting with our Superintendent which was not so super. The cuts are pretty ugly. They think that they can handle it all without having to resort to a RIF (Reduction In Workforce--ie firing people with tenure) but they aren't sure. So basically I'm still walking on that ledge, and I won't know for sure which way I fall for at least another month...or more. I think that legally they are required to tell me by June 15th.

I just hate uncertainty!! It seems like my whole life is full of it!

Plus, I'm still not done writing those stupid journals! And class is tomorrow! I have 2 journals, 1 paper, 2 cubes to make, and 2 anchoring activities. Damn, that's a lot of work. I sure don't feel like doing any of it!! *Sigh* Guess I'll start on the paper & cubes and when I finish I'll reward myself with a little break...

1 comment:

  1. Still thinking good thoughts for you!! Halfway there is awesome :) but I know, waiting and analyzing and feelings of hopelessness... it's so hard. I really really hope this sticks for you!

    Distract yourself with something fun maybe? Have you ever seen the cake wrecks blog? Oh that has had me in tears from laughing so much! hehe if you're interested