Sleeping.. A lot

I'm still here... Just finding the time to post has become more challenging. These days I'm either working, eating, or sleeping. I'm finding that 11 hours at night, well, it's just not enough! So I'm supplementing with naps too ;) I do remember this from last time around. Also making an appearance is nausea! While on one hand, it is a relief to feel it because that means everything is still okay, man... It sure is a pain.

Our last u/s went well, and we were able to see two strong steady heartbeats. We've been graduated from our RE (with strict instructions to come back in 9 months to show our the fruits of all our labors... but absolutely no sooner!) and this Tuesday we'll meet our MFM for the first time. I'm pretty nervous about the appt. I really really want to like the practice and this doc because I definitely need someone who has experience with high-risk and prior losses. I also don't want them to be upset with me for showing up with twins...

I'm working through all that with my therapist though, and I think I'm making progress. He also really helped me come up with something to say to the two responses I'm worrying about hearing when people find out I'm expecting twins again. (Really, just two sides to the same coin...) That people will think these twins can possibly replace my baby girls and that this will be different because my prior pregnancy (and babies) were wrong in someway. It's all from that same 'Everything happens for a reason' train of thought that I can't stand. We worked on it and I've decided that when people start down that path, I'll merely say "I will always love my first two girls." I like the simplicity and non-confrontationalness of this statement. Plus, it feels good to say, because it is true.

On a last note, I told my fellow first grade teachers because I will be relying on them heavily in the coming weeks and months. (Plus, we're a pretty tight group.) They were thrilled for me, and it was nice to feel that happiness! One is a very young teacher, and after I told them it was twins again she said 'Oh! What are the odds of that?' I just had to look at her and laugh... I replied 'About 20% chance each time I cycle!'